Monday, August 31, 2009

okay, honestly speaking...

recently i met another guy online... okay before we get all "accusing" here, let me state that i didn't meet meet him... yet?

so the background story is that he found me via the online dating site (which i promise i haven't logged into in ages) and recently added me on IM. we've since chatted some and frankly we get along really well. i found him to be nice, eloquent and with a sense of humor. his pictures also showed that he wasn't unattractive. honestly if i were single, i would have so thought of him as a potential prospect.

but i'm not.

and therefore when he kinda asked me out the first time, i wasn't sure how to react and kinda just brushed it aside ('coz he didn't really ask me out properly other than just a vague suggestion of possibly meeting up). but then he asked me out with a more proper plan in the form of a hey if you want to meet up tonight for a drink just buzz me kinda thing and that was when i started to feel bad.

i'm not really interested per se. i mean i could be. but i'm happy with the alpha boy and not looking for someone else to fill the status of 'boyfriend' in my life. but being attached isn't really something i just tell people either. it's sorta like a if you don't ask, i don't say kinda thing. but then i started thinking that maybe i should say something to him. not that i think that he's totally into me or whatever, but him finding me on an online dating site (even though i promise i haven't logged into in ages) kinda just makes certain implications such as i'm single and looking.

in the end, i told him that i was cool with meeting him but just as friends 'coz i was attached. he might have seemed a lil surprised but also appreciated that i let him know. and i just felt so much better after that.

and i think that kinda all worked out. we are still continuing to have engaging conversations on IM and increasingly realising how similar we are especially in terms of speech and words used. i have to admit that i'm curious to meet him. as friends of 'coz. i only wonder if that is considered okay?

6 Comments:

At 11:23 AM, OpenID talesfromabarstool said...

He's definitely still going to try to bone you... Even though you've thrown down the "friend" card. Just saying...

 
At 2:08 PM, Blogger You Make My Date said...

Haha I agree with talesfromabarstool - guys often try and fly under the "friends" radar.

But as long as you make it clear that it's not on, and that you're interested in alpha boy, then there's no reason why you can't still hang out! Just make sure it's not in an environment where either of you gets super-drunk and says/does something stupid.
Trust me on that one.

Do you think you should mention it to alpha boy though?

 
At 3:49 PM, Blogger jo said...

talesfromabarstool: really?? i mean i haven't met him yet but from our IMs, i don't get that feeling. i mean it's friendly and not like laden with sexual innuendoes...

you make my date: good question bout whether i should mention it to the alpha boy. i'm thinking no haha! but if i do meet up with that online guy, i'll tell the alpha boy that i'm meeting up with a guy. but i don't think i'll go into specifics bout the hows and whys?

 
At 12:12 AM, Blogger Dora said...

Answer just one question.... how would you feel if alpha boy did the exact same thing? Then you know what is right for you.

 
At 3:45 AM, Anonymous ~AV~ said...

Gotta say, I agree with Dora on this one.

Also, are you feeling unsure about the alpha boy still? Because, I feel like from my experiences, if I really like someone, I would never really even think about meeting up with another guy from online...the thought would probably not even cross my mind if I was truly happy and secure. Are you looking at this guy as a possible romantic match and not just a friend??

 
At 4:14 PM, Blogger jo said...

AV: i'm not feeling unsure bout the alpha boy. and i'm sure that i'm looking at this guy as just a friend. if it weren't the case, i wouldn't have been upfront with him bout being attached. i just didn't want him to think it was anything more than it is. i just like talking to him and think that we could actually be friends ('coz he seems different just like how i'm different from most everyone else here).

 

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