Tuesday, August 18, 2009

after it's all over

every now and then, drummer boy and i do engage in some IM conversing. and recently we had one of those again.

it started out with us talking bout our separate love lifes. more him talking than me in this instance. and then it moved on to talking bout older men and younger women. it was then that he made a joking reference if he was the last older guy that i attracted. he was, in fact. since technically he's bout 3 months older than the swedish guy.

and then he went on to say...

drummer boy: oh but i've always wanted to tell u this
jo: what?
drummer boy: it would set my heart at ease
drummer boy: oh i want to say sorry for anything that i did or did not do
jo: aww thanks for that
drummer boy: i really felt really bad abt it

we continued to have a relatively open conversation bout that. i told him that he could have handled it better at the end and caused me less confusion and torment. we both agreed that though we both thought that we got along very well, some part of our communication was lacking especially at the end.

he felt that he really needed to get it off his chest. 'coz he felt really bad especially since he knew that i was a good person. and he didn't want to be hated by a nice person like me. i assured him that i never hated him. nor did i actually ever held a grudge against him. i always still regarded him as a friend.

i also told him honestly that i have no regrets of our time together. at least i've learnt something through it all. and i'm glad that whatever happened or did not happen, we still somehow managed to stay friends.

and i really am.



At 3:01 AM, Blogger Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Well...his loss, isn't it.

Sounds like he's wishing things turned out differently with you two.

At 1:03 PM, Blogger jo said...

please don't eat with your mouth open: actually i don't really think that he wishes things turned out differently between us. i mean he seems very happy now with his new girlfriend. i think he just felt really bad for treating me the way he did at the end. but well, i believe things happen for a reason. sure, i sometimes think back on the things that once were and wonder what they maybe could have been. and as much as i did like him before, i'm convinced that we would have never worked out together anyway 'coz he wasn't really all that i wanted. but if we were both single, i might still wanna make out with him hahaha!


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