Thursday, September 10, 2009

indeed it wasn't the last we heard bout this

as much as i like the "other woman", i always knew that that whole issue i have with her would come back to haunt me again.

and as predicted, recently it did.

i felt that it was kinda unnecessary that essentially the alpha boy had been meeting up with her every week for the last few weeks. granted a few times were to help her settle some school stuff. but honestly, i don't see why she couldn't have just bought her books and her printer by herself?

and i guess some of my displeasure did seep through and the alpha boy being occasionally sharp as he is on such matters, could tell from a text message that i wasn't too pleased.

he called me. i didn't hear my phone and hence missed it. i called him back but wasn't ready to talk bout it. i went off for a run while i thought bout it and came back feeling clearer bout what exactly i was feeling and texted him.

jo: hey hun im back from my run… which gave me some time to think i suppose... so while im not super upset per se, as ive mentioned before, im not entirely thrilled either. i think its just tt ur lifes r too intertwined w e reliance n e sharing n all tt. which i suppose makes me wonder how am i different from *insert the "other woman's" name* if u meet her, talk to her n share w her just bout as much. anyhow dear i reckon ur still out w her so we can talk bout this or whatever later…

no word from him till bout 2 hours later when he called me on his way home from meeting her.

we talked bout it and i think maybe this time he got it a lil better. i know that she's his good friend and good friends do things with each other and help each other and all that. but i explained that there's always some boundaries when it comes to good friends of the opposite sex. it's just different. and so i gave him an example of what happened if it were me being close to a guy friend and seeing that guy friend every week and what happens if to make matters worst, that guy friend was an ex boyfriend. when he admitted that he would be uncomfy with that, i think he got it.

i'm not sure if this whole issue is entirely over. it may very well not be. but i think that at least we're another step closer to him realising my point of view. in any case i hear that she might be getting attached soon… and that might bring a further change to the way things are between 'em… 'coz as it is, it seems to me that perhaps a larger part of the "problem" is that she contacts him bout every other day and he doesn't quite know how to stop that either...



At 12:36 AM, Blogger audrey22 said...

i think that you are amazing! lol honestly if that were me i would have blew up at my bf and gone on a rampage. i agree ex's whether good friends or not shouldn't be spending that much time together, it is just weird! i mean ok i may understand getting coffee once in a blue moon maybe but not so often!. im glad you let him know how you felt though because he needs to understand where you're coming from. i hope this improves the situation! and props to you for keeping your cool and communicating your issue without acting like a crazy jealous gf.

At 9:13 PM, Blogger jo said...

audrey: thanks for the compliment :) i always try and not seem like the crazy jealous girlfriend. and i suppose naturally i usually prefer to stop and think bout what exactly is bothering me and rationalise it before flying off the handle. i don't handle confrontation very well haha!

that said, i'm quite sure that this "problem" doesn't just end here. yeah sure while he may seem more aware now, the fact remains that you just can't "break" an almost unnaturally close friendship like that that has been going on for years. i have a feeling that, i will just have to live with it and/or repeat myself. my best bet is that things will get a bit better if she gets attached. though even then, that's not a given 'coz she calls or texts him all the time to talk bout every bit of her life. yeah that's how close they are. sigh...


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