Thursday, May 26, 2011

i may like pickles, but i sure don't like being in one

going through my blog post achives, i'm really surprised that i didn't mention this before since it was a fairly surprising and "panic" inducing discovery back in late february when i realised from photographs being tagged that the swedish guy knows my oldest school friend through some mutual friends who included a classmate of ours (me and my oldest school friend).

i don't know how they all wound up knowing each other and actually organising relatively frequent social gatherings together but it freaked me out to know that the world is too small. and it's the swedish guy to boot. admittedly i have always had a soft spot for him since he was the one just before the alpha boy and the one i would have chosen if he showed me more interest then. there are some amazing things bout the swedish guy's personality which i can't quite forget and we just had natural chemistry.

recently i decided to make it a point to reconnect with my old school friends. we were so close when we were younger and had all that history together. and somehow just drifted apart as we grew older even though some were still close to each other. so since then i've been making a definite effort to keep in touch via emails (as it seems to now be one of the best ways) and i think it's paid off.

last night i was invited for dinner with my oldest school friend, her boyfriend and a few of her (and now his) other friends. it was a lovely time where i really enjoyed myself thoroughly. at the end of dinner, there was mention of a whisky night coming up of which invites were sent out by her boyfriend a few days prior.

now, i'm a big fan of whisky and an even bigger fan of social gatherings and making more friends. naturally i thought this would be a perfect social occasion for me. i expressed my interest and they were eager to extend to me the invite as well.

as proof of their sincereity, i received the invite first thing in the morning. it was a forwarded invite. and i saw everyone else who were previously invited in the earlier email.

yep, it was the swedish guy. and i had just told the alpha boy the night before that perhaps he could join me for the whisky night.

so here now lies my dilemma... i really want to go for this. i can't really think of reasons not to (other than sheer awkwardness) and yet i really don't want the alpha boy and the swedish guy to meet. in any case, the alpha boy isn't good in unknown social settings whereas i relish and usually shine in them. i don't want him to feel uncomfortable but i don't want to be held back either. it gets even more complicated 'coz due to the alpha boy's work schedule, he's only free on saturday nights and sundays.

i can't think of a way for me to go for this without the alpha boy and yet spend some time with him somehow and keep him happy. sigh maybe this wouldn't have been as much as a problem if the alpha boy were more sociable.

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At 1:09 PM, Anonymous belle said...

Doesn't make sense that you want to leave your b.f at home. What's going to happen when/if you get married to him? You'd leave him at home then too?

Hmmm sounds like someone wants to play with fire :)

At 2:31 PM, Blogger jo said...

belle: i don't really want to play with fire. it's purely a friendly social thing and nothing more. i just think this is a potentially too-awkward situation. but in general, the alpha boy also doesn't enjoy social gatherings whereas i do. and though sometimes i do bring him along, he isn't always keen on going or i feel like he's quite awkward and uncomfortable.

At 2:53 AM, Blogger Lifebeginsat30ty said...

I don't see anything wrong with wanting to spend time with friends outside of a couple. But I also understand wanting to spend time alone with certain guys *wink* even when you are both taken and don't really want anything to happen. It's like a little zing to your life, a little cherry on top which would be ruined by the BF being there. Tough one though. I say invite alpha boy but give him the option to decline.

At 4:27 PM, Blogger jo said...

lifebeginsat30ty: i think you've pretty much hit the nail on the head. if the swedish guy is there, i would very much like to catch up with him which would be something that is very hard to do with the alpha boy around. the alpha boy probably wouldn't decline but then i'm afraid he might be uncomfortable and then spoil my mood. in any case i think i managed to strike a balance where i meet him earlier and then meet my friends later. he's probably not entirely pleased but so far i reckon he's going for that alternative.


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