just like a paperback novel

my strange guy friend has been lying low in the last few months. but recently he awakened.

early in the conversation, he suddenly sprung a surprise on me...

strange guy friend: call me big brother
strange guy friend: wakakakaka
jo: hahaha!
strange guy friend: mmm
strange guy friend: dear little sister
strange guy friend: let's have an incentous relationship
strange guy friend: wakakakaka

i nearly fell off my chair.

i don't want any kind of relationship with him and i'm certainly not advocating an incentous one.

jo: ack! there will be no relationship... incentous or otherwise

strange guy friend: aww you're so bad
strange guy friend: i want i want
strange guy friend: i don't care
strange guy friend: huhuhuhu
jo: dude you're freaking me out!

but really why should i be? i mean it's not like he hasn't freaked me out all the other times i've talked to him.

so why do i still talk to him?

actually i don't. not exactly that is. he always initiates a conversation with me. and for the most part i just humour him a lil. anyway i don't take anything he says all that seriously 'coz i know that everything he says is just a joke. sometimes i just think he's lonely and really wants a girlfriend. that must be why he is obsessed with my love life.

strange guy friend: got bf yet?
strange guy friend: or still having such high expectations
jo: how would you even know what kind of expectations i have? and it's not that high...
strange guy friend: i say high cause you have so far rejected the so many who were after you

sometimes i really wonder where he gets that from. i mean it's not like i even tell him if there's anyone after me... or not...

strange guy friend: unless all of them are really that bad a quality...

wow! it's as though he's been reading this blog. how does he know that most of the guys i've met aren't quality guys? or is it just that 'coz non quality guys outweigh quality guys? lucky guess, buddy.

strange guy friend: you're not bad looking
strange guy friend: even the ugly girls have suitors

great. now i really feel like there's something wrong with me. something so wrong that it surpasses ugly girls.

but sometimes he does manage to provide some insight (or at least just some sight) and hit the nail on the head...

strange guy friend: maybe coz you have a cold face... people find it hard to approach you?
strange guy friend: though i know you're not

yes, sadly i'm one of those with a naturally cool and detatched look. that's just my face's resting state.

strange guy friend: smile more
jo: i'm quite friendly and smiley
jo: but i don't walk around smiling away. i will look like a lunatic haha!

seriously i smile and laugh a lot.

strange guy friend: i think you're shy to people you don't know but rowdy with people you are close to

i never imagined he could make me do this... but that got me thinking.

i think it just depends on my mood and whether i 'click' with the other person. there have been times where i'm very open and friendly to a complete stranger (while completely sober i might add). and then there are other times where i just feel like i have nothing to say so i don't say a whole lot.

i thought bout my party girl who always manages to have long conversations with random guys she meets in the bar. she sees no harm in spilling her guts to complete strangers she just met. that's just how who she is. that's not who i am. i don't even spill my guts to my closer friends. certain friends know certain things bout me and that's bout it. i'm not real big on self disclosure. which then makes it practically impossible for me to talk bout stuff going on in my life to a complete stranger. why would he care that i'm very interested in certain sports and fitness. or that i still can't quite decided if i should go back to school. or what my hopes and dreams are. and i certainly don't care to tell either.

i'm not a closed book. more like a paperback novel. so i guess it just takes time for me to warm up and open up. how long that will take just depends on how well we 'click' and how comfy i feel.

then again i guess sometimes even when you do find someone you 'click' with, he could up and find someone else even better after a great first date thus closing that door behind him.

such is the complications of life.