the cosmic joke

so last night i was supposed to meet up with 2 of my ex-colleagues for dinner and drinks. but then one by one they started cancelling on dinner. and then another one decided she was already too drunk to go for further drinks. in the end i decided to just call the entire thing off.

i met up with my party girl and the yummy mommy in the german/aussie's hotel room to help my party girl dress up for her office's porn star party (note that she does not work in anything related to the adult entertainment industry haha!). that was pretty fun. and then later the yummy mommy, the german/aussie and i went for dinner and drinks before "crashing" my party girl's office party at the tail end.

and then we all headed back to the german/aussie's hotel room before midnight 'coz my party girl and the german/aussie were going away for the weekend to meet his friends and had to wake up early this morning.

the yummy mommy then suggested that she and i head to cozy hole-in-the-wall bar and asked me to call dj guy to find out if the bar was still open. i did. the bar was open. and then he was the one who brought up the subject that he got paid late and he couldn't pay his phone bills so the phone company cut off his outgoing texts and calls.

do i believe that? actually yes. 'coz i think kinda knowing what he's like, he wouldn't really bother coming up with any excuse if he just didn't wanna answer me then. and he was the one who brought up the subject first. probably 'coz he figured that that wasn't the kind of text you totally ignored.

the time when i was in the bar, it was kinda like usual times. where occasionally he could walk past behind me and brush my hair outta my face or touch my neck or just poke me in general. i even had a chance to actually talk to him proper for a while. though we didn't talk bout the text. honestly i probably didn't even really want to. before i left with the yummy mommy, we pecked on the lips goodbye. all very innocent.

so where does this leave me and him and this somewhat strange situation we have going on? well i think just bout exactly where it was all along. i don't really regret telling him. sure it puts me in a possibly more vulnerable position having kinda laid my cards on the table. and typically weird of me, even when i do lay my cards, i still don't really like to have the whole dtr (define the relationship) thing. possibly 'coz it forces a decision either way that i'm not ready to make. i just have to laugh at this cosmic joke bout how whenever i get rare moments of honesty with dj guy, it's always at such an "excellent" timing.