what a girl wants... to know

sometimes i think that when God was handing out dating smarts, i must have missed the line entirely. i didn't get my copy of dating for dummies. i must have gotten the copy of how to mess up in dating instead.

i fully admit that my dating knowledge is largely limited. and there are few things i would really like to know.

1. how do you really truly get over someone?
'coz i've tried and tried and i can't really seem to do it successfully. there just always seems to be that latent feeling there. they say time heals all wounds. i say, time wounds all heels. and we all know that to be perhaps more true. but i can't help it when my heart smiles when i think of certain someone(s) right?

2. how do you avoid getting emotionally attached?
'coz i think if i mastered that, then at least most of my heartaches wouldn't have even occured in the first place. usually it's just me saying that i'm not emotionally attached when really that heart of mine had my head fooled. and by the time i realise it, it's too late and things have already gone bad, leaving me to slap myself once again for getting emotionally involved.

3. where on earth do you even meet guys?
'coz i. just. don't. know. i mean seriously. i've tried the school method, the online method, the bar method, the friends of friends method, the various other groups method. short of stalking some poor unsuspecting stranger on the street, i'm kinda at a loss for other possible ways. and i am inclined to believe that the stalking of unsuspecting stranger on the street method will only result in a further traumatic experience.

4. how do you just throw in the towel?
'coz that silly thing called hope keeps standing in the way. you see, hope doesn't quite listen too much to reason and self-preservation. hope kinda just likes to go on its own way. and get me in trouble. i try to immerse myself in work, school, family, friends, sports... but no one really quite lets you forget that you're still single. most of all yourself. and you just want to give up entirely, say it doesn't matter... but you can't figure out how to, 'coz somehow it does matter...

5. where do you get a copy of that dating for dummies manual?
'coz honestly i need it. i've been so unclued in and so messed up for so long. actually perhaps the greater truth is that i don't mess up enough to at least have a good casual fun time but mess up enough to not have a good long-term time. yes, i join the ranks of sheer mediocrity.

i wished i knew the answers... life would probably be a lot easier if i did...