Thursday, July 17, 2008

the non discerning approach to online dating "experiment"

over a month ago i introduced a good friend of mine to the "joys" of online dating and yesterday she texted me a lil "frantic" if she should add a new guy on IM. i had been avoiding the online dating site partly 'coz i started to feel like i had just bout exhausted all online potentials and couldn't really be bothered with most others. and yet i acknowledged that i really needed to get back into the dating game, not that i'm even sure if i've ever been in it to begin with. i guess all that talk with her kinda motivated me to get out there or whatever cliche statement.

so i logged back into the online dating site. and this time i decided not to be so discerning. for the first time ever, i winked at so many guys. i decided not to approach this wondering if i could possibly see a future with the guy. for now i simply settled for someone that i found reasonably interesting enough to possibly get to know a lil better. and so i winked and winked. i thought i was going to utilise all the winks i would get (if there is even a limit to winks).

i don't know if anything is going to come outta this "experiment". and to be honest, even if none of 'em tried to contact me back (though one guy already added me on IM and we had a very brief conversation), i wouldn't really be too bothered 'coz i wasn't particularly interested in any particular guy. this is just me really trying not to think bout it too much and just putting myself out there.

maybe i'd get some dates outta this. i could sure do with getting back into "serial dating". if nothing else, i could sure do with some new guys to help me distract and delude myself into thinking that the ad-man doesn't mean as much to me as he does. i have to distract and delude myself. afterall, when i logged into the online dating site, i realised that he had just logged in an hour ago.


last night i met up with a friend for dinner. incidentally she is the same friend whose husband belongs to the same triathlon team as chatty triathlete.

in our lil catch up session, she mentioned that recently she and her husband ran into chatty triathlete in a bike shop and in their brief conversation, he said this...

chatty triathlete: the cost of a bike is on her finger

my friend took it to mean that chatty triathlete is engaged to his girlfriend or fiancee or whatever.

wow! i mean... wow! he really wasn't kidding when he told me that they were discussing marriage even though back then they had only been together for a month. so now 6 months down the road and she has a rock, the cost of a bicycle (and chatty triathlete likes 'em high end high performance road bikes), on her finger.

i'm sure my mom will say that it could have been me. i don't think it could have. we couldn't have worked out. but it sure doesn't help in not making me feel like there's something wrong with me that guys seem to decide to pass on.



At 8:39 AM, Blogger SaneAndSingle said...

Your mom may say that it could have been you. But think about it, it isn't you for a reason. As cliche as it sounds, I truly believe all things happen for a reason. He is engaged to her for a reason. I think everything we go through is a lesson in life. It's just too bad some us have to continue learning over and over and over and over, huh?

As for the online dating....bah humbug! I've had my fill.

At 1:54 PM, Blogger jo said...

saneandsingle: you're so right in saying that everything we go through is a lesson in life. i too believe that. failures are the signposts to success or whatever other cliche there might be.

as for online dating, well honestly i'm tired of it but now that i started that ball rolling, i gotta at least follow up with those that have contacted me...

At 6:52 AM, Anonymous lailani said...

maybe you smell really bad. I mean... I doubt it, but anything is possbile ;)
Or- maybe these guys just aren't right for you and the universe can tell. I'd go with that answer.

At 9:15 PM, Blogger jo said...

lailani: whew! thanks for that vote of confidence that i don't smell really bad :P


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