i don't know how much more of this i can take...

late sunday night (or rather early monday morning) the ad-man and i made plans to watch a movie on monday night. we had been talking bout that for the past week but had yet to set a day. i told him to let me know the time and place to meet. but come monday evening 6pm, i had yet to hear from him.

this is the thing i never quite understand bout guys. how they have the ability to somehow totally forget that they were supposed to let you know the time and place to meet. it's almost as though they can't be bothered to remember their plans with you in the first place.

so i was doing some "game playing" by seeing how long i could refuse to contact him. obviously i'm a loser in this "game" so i gave in and contacted him as i expected i would. he remembered the meeting up but forgot that he was supposed to let me know the time and place to meet. well given the fact that he was feeling a lil sick and had been pretty much sleeping the day away (a fact that i only knew later when i met up with him), i decided not to get mildly annoyed.

the movie and dinner though rushed was pretty good. seriously, i wished he would just hurry up and realise that he likes me.

****

in other news, it's amazing what you can learn through the online social utility site. and the last thing i expected to learn was that dj guy is engaged... to his ex girlfriend no less!

of 'coz i'm assuming she must be his current girlfriend... or fiancee or whatever now. and apparently he did get past the whole she cheating on him twice thing. (yes, i admit that i'm a lil sore that i don't get offered the same level of forgiveness for doing something far less hurtful.)

but it's a lil strange i must say... 'coz i'm reading the messages she left on his site and the most recent one had her actually questioning his engagement...

dj guy's ex girlfriend: wat?!? ur engaged????......

you would think that if she was the one being engaged to him, she'll know right?

and since i was there, i saw another message she left a month ago...

dj guy's ex girlfriend: i shall always Luv u... u shall always be a part of me and my life... keep in touch my darlin luv... am missin u deeply... am luving u til i take my last breath

okay that was a lil too much mush for me.

so how do i feel bout all of this? honestly i would be lying if i said that this didn't affect me at all. 'coz as strong as my feelings are for the ad-man and as much as he helped me "get over" dj guy, the feelings i do have for dj guy never really did truly go away. i suppose just like any feelings you have for any guy that made it to your heart, they never really truly go away even if you've found someone new who is so much better for you.

in some weird way, it's almost as though it has come full circle for the complication that is dj guy and me. afterall how we started in the first place was when one day he suddenly asked me if he had ever told me that he was engaged 'coz if so, that wasn't him.

and now, he's really engaged... or maybe he's not... i don't know, it's too complicated... just like it's always been with me and him. but yes, i don't deny that as crazy as it is, he's still in my heart...

[edit]

and 'coz i exhibit stalker tendencies like that, i just checked out dj guy's page on the online social utility site and i found out that the message from his ex girlfriend questioning his engagement (to her no less!) has been deleted making it seem more like they are really engaged. except that i did see that deleted message... which makes it seem more than ever like he's trying to get rid of someone's unwanted affection?

that's the draw of dj guy that i never quite figured. somehow this bad boy type (maybe that in itself explains it?) just gets all the girls falling in love with him... and i hate to say that even i wasn't an exception...