the pussycat dolls were right when they sang i hate this part

a lil "flirty" texting back and forth and i wound up at the swedish guy's house on sunday night.

we didn't do much. just chilling with a few glasses of the wine that i had brought over and watching dvds. and since his female french flatmate was back, we made our way to his bedroom to chat after we got tired of watching dvds with the sound down low.

nothing happened. seriously. i mean not even a kiss. it was like the old days. except that i helped him put some moisturiser on his back and he gave me a back massage.

i know i'm overanalyzing. but did he maybe decide to back off and play it safe? or maybe he was just tired from a day's worth of sports where he managed to hurt his lip a lil. (and yes, i kid you not on the lip.) well i'm sure i'm just overthinking all this right?

but the thing is this... i hate this part. it was easier when i wasn't interested in him. but now that i am, i'm wondering what's going on and what does it mean. it's annoying. i wished i knew what was going on and what did it mean.

and ridiculously so, i wished that he was more into contacting me like drummer boy used to be. then again drummer boy and i never lasted that long, nor did we ever have the ability to communicate as well... i guess you can't win all the time eh?