Thursday, July 24, 2008

and now i know what pain feels like...

maybe i have some sort of ESP... 'coz recently i had been thinking to myself that maybe the ad-man has gotten attached. just one of my weird random thoughts. i mean if you prepare for the worst, then at least you're prepared right?

yeah well no one could prepare me for the pain.

today i found out from a status change in the online social utitlity site that the ad-man was attached. i couldn't see her profile but from her profile pic, she's hot.

and then i felt the stab in my heart.

okay this hurts. it seriously freaking physically hurts. i find the one guy who i really really liked and thought that we would be good together and he winds up getting attached?

of 'coz the ad-man was multi-dating. i didn't expect him not to. i was the only idiot who felt guilty when i was making out with shrek boy 'coz i really liked someone else. and the worst part is that i don't even get to date other guys before i found out that the ad-man is attached? this is stupid timing. i mean couldn't it even wait 2 days?? i lined up 2 dates this weekend in my own attempt to "serial date". but now the rejection is a bigger slap to my face 'coz like an idiot i didn't "serial date" while i was "dating" the ad-man.

so i put my emotions totally out there only to get all this pain in return. i'm finding it increasingly difficult to find it all worth it.

[edit]

so i listened to the rascal flatts song bless the broken road and finally cried. i wonder if i'll ever be able to sing that song and truly mean it.

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4 Comments:

At 12:29 AM, Blogger SaneAndSingle said...

Awww...*hugs*

Dust yourself off and get back out there. Don't put all your hopes into one guy, especially if you know he is serial dating and you rarely talk to him!! You're too good for that!

 
At 1:12 AM, Blogger jo said...

saneandsingle: thanks hun. yeah i know i should be thinking all these things like how it's his loss and all that but right now at this point i can't. i'm hurting too freaking much. it really had promise and potential. more than i've ever seen and that's what makes it harder for me. i know i'll get over this eventually... but right now i'm just a weepy mess...

 
At 8:45 AM, Anonymous Ecrivain said...

It's slap in the face -- that's how it feels...except worse, 'cause you feel it in your heart and a part of you hates yourself for feeling that way...but ultimately, you can't help what you feel.

I wish I had the magic words to make you feel better, but having been where you are, I know that the only thing that makes the sting go away is time.

 
At 1:15 AM, Anonymous lailani said...

So many people do that when they multi-date. They just do the "in a relationship" change and let the other girls/guys figure it out themselves. Not klassy at all.

 

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