setups and blind dates

notcarrie's post inspired me to tell my tale of setups and blind dates.

in my lifetime i've had the opportunity to be set up a few times by a few different friends. some of 'em were casual group hangs, some seemed forced and others were more of a real blind date kinda thing.


first setup
age: 19
the guy: he was my friend's guy interest's friend. same age. very tall, lanky and kinda cute. seemed shy. generally quite a nice guy.
background basics: it was essentially a double date. my friend's guy interest had invited her to an event where he needed a date. his friend didn't have a date. my friend suggested me. i was young, single and game for some fun. my friend and i talked for weeks bout what to wear in line with the hawaiian theme and she came over my house to dress up and make up before the event.
setup story: it's been so long ago so some parts are kinda sketchy. i just remember that the guys were really gentlemanly. i think the whole event was to show off these gentlemanly skills and prove that the organisers had successfully converted these boys into men. my date pulled the chair for me and even helped me line up for food in the buffet line. how he knew what i liked or didn't like to eat was beyond me. all in all i think it went really well considering that it was my first blind date and i was pretty nervous. i think i even developed a small lil crush on him.
aftermath: i had hoped that perhaps we would be able to get together again but that didn't happen. a year or so later, i realised that he's in the same lecture group as a good friend of mine. i had crashed her medical lecture group and saw him there. he remembered me and smiled. i can't remember if any actual words were exchanged. if they were, it certainly wasn't eventful. he wasn't as cute as before. seems like medical school had caused him to be even lankier.


second setup
age: 20
the guy: he was my cousin's church friend. 30s, plumpish and nerdy. i didn't even notice him.
background basics: my cousin thought that her friend is a really nice guy... except that he's somehow always managed to like the unattainable girls... the girls who were already married or had boyfriends. they were in the process of helping him revamping his image... changing his glasses and dressing style. they probably thought a new girl would be good too.
setup story: my cousin sometimes holds these christmas parties at her house and our entire family is invited along with some of her church friends. at the party i was actually more preoccupied with feeding myself than scoping out the guys. anyway they're mostly all too old and unattractive to me. on hindsight, i realised that my cousin did in fact introduce the setup guy to me but i didn't think too much of it then. and he was so shy that he never really talked to me either. i didn't really notice him which is not a good sign... but i did notice one rather cute guy who looked bout my age. nothing happened. i mean my entire family is there!
aftermath: a few years later he got married to another girl in my cousin's church and they now have 2 kids. i've seen his wifey. she's pretty cute. him not so much. but i guess that makeover worked out somehow.


third setup
age: 25
the guy: to be honest i wasn't entirely sure who was the intended setup until much later. 30s, not much impression of him except that he definitely worked out a fair bit. he seemed nice though maybe a bit quiet.
background basics: my mom has a friend in his 30s who is really cool and that i get along with. per usual my mom would sometimes ask her friends if they know anyone to set me up with (yeah thanks mom!) and this friend of hers decided to invite me for a group hang at his house.
setup story: i don't rememeber the group there much 'coz there were so many of 'em and i was the newbie struggling to remember names and be social. but it was fun. i think i wound up being more attracted to another guy than the original one that my friend wanted to set me up with.
aftermath: i had hoped that my friend would invite me along for more group hangs but he didn't. then again most of the time when they hang out it's to do something extreme like night cycling, triathalons and whatnot. i don't cycle.


fourth setup
age: 25
the guy: he was my good friend's boyfriend's (now he's her fiance) cousin. 30s, rather successful investment banker. on the short side with a strange swagger type of walk. not cute and worst of all... boring!
background basics: my friend and her boyfriend were thinking of who to set me up with when they decided upon his cousin. apparently he was tired of all the skanky girls in his office and wanted to meet someone who wasn't like that.
setup story: we went on a double date to a place for dinner and drinks. right off i was not attracted to him at all. but i still played nice. we chatted a lil bit but i found him incredibly boring. seriously everytime he started talking, i wanted to zone out. oh why couldn't he have gotten the good genes that my friend's boyfriend so obviously got. i think in the end i wound up chatting with my friend more. our plans got cut short 'coz my friend's boyfriend had to rush off last minute to help out a friend in trouble. of 'coz my friend had to drive him there. the cousin declares that he has some friends who have asked him out for drinks. the polite thing would probably have been to extend an invitation for me to join him. actually the more polite thing would have been to suggest that we could just stay on for drinks since we were just bout to order before all plans changed. but the cousin did neither. not exactly the best impression to make. i guess he wasn't bowled over by me either.
aftermath: i kept seeing him around... walking down the street, in the pub... but he never saw me. or if he did, definitely didn't bother to catch my eye in acknowledgement of our bad blind date. apparently according to my friend, he's got a girlfriend now. great. now he can go bore someone else.


fifth setup
age: 25
the guy: to be honest i wasn't entirely sure who was the intended setup until much later. pics aren't always very telling. in his 30s. he was rather quiet but was nice enough to drive me back.
background basics: my ex colleague had long been trying to get me to hang out with her group of friends. she would bring pics to the office to show me. one day i just decided to go for it.
setup story: we all went for a very casual dinner and then for some ice-cream. as with groups, one meeting is hardly enough for me to remember everyone's names or have much impression on 'em. but it was pretty fun. at the end of the night, the setup guy drove me back since he was going my way. we chatted a bit 'coz it's just 2 of us in the car and we have to chat or else it makes for a really awkward and silent car ride. he's pretty nice though i'm probably waay too chatty for him.
aftermath: my ex colleague resigned from the company and i haven't kept in touch with her since. hmm... i think i should go check in with her to see how she's doing...


sixth setup
age: 26
the guy: he was my oldest school friend's then boyfriend's old school friend. around my age. tall, lanky and not particularly attractive to me. seems nice but i think we would have communication problems.
background basics: for some strange reason my oldest school friend kept pushing for me to meet him. in the end she just decided to invite him along for one of our meeting ups.
setup story: my oldest school friend and i met up first since he could only make it later after work. it was weird 'coz basically she made the poor guy walk in the middle of us. and she kept pushing us together like to buy our food or something. he was nice and all but i think we just didn't really click. in fact she was talking to him most of the time. complaining bout her then boyfriend. they were having some problems.
aftermath: never seen or heard of ever since. i'm not even sure if my oldest school friend is still in touch with him. it's gotta be a bit tricky when he's the friend of her ex... and the ex that she thinks is such a loser...


seventh setup
age: 26
the guy: he's marvy the martian's old friend from his former french class. 1-2 years younger than me. tall, lanky and kinda cute with a cheeky yet shy look. nice and very easy to talk to.
background basics: marvy the martian kinda just sprung the setup on me. i'm not sure if it can really be officially called a setup 'coz he only told both of us bout the other and the rest was left to us.
setup story: the first 'blind date' setup i ever had where the person who introduced us wasn't even there and we had to organise it ourselves. but i had a great time.
aftermath: it's still too early to say though he did text and IM me a few times after our meeting up.

and here ends my tale of setups and blind dates to date... maybe there will be more... i don't know... as long as i remain single and there are well-meaning friends and family, i suspect there might be more to come...