even if you're going forward, sometimes the past is still there...

yesterday was the swedish guy's birthday. i've always known that i was going to wish him. i suppose it was my own bid to reopen the lines of communication and leave the ball in his court.

jo: hey happy birthday! have yourself a good one :)

he replied.

the swedish guy: thank you!

that wasn't very inspiring. i guess that just bout seals the lines of any possible potential communication?

****

drummer boy has been continuing to try for another chance with me. that was definitely evident in the obvious IM flirting yesterday and asking me out for today. but i was on the phone with the alpha boy and wasn't really able to IM.

i've been trying to avoid having to meet up with drummer boy. i know that at some point really soon, i'll have to tell him that i'm attached. but for some strange reason i find it hard to do so. maybe 'coz it's drummer boy. and that history we have. technically i owe him nothing. he ended it 7 months ago by not replying to my email and acting all weird. but i suppose i still wanna be friends.

****

and a new friend i did make last night. some months ago i got to know this guy from the online dating site. we talked bout meeting up and actually once arranged a day but somehow or another we couldn't meet up till now. he was also the one who was the most understanding when i was going through my dating detox.

this time i was upfront and honest with him bout it being just as friends 'coz i was attached. and he was very cool bout it all. we met up and i had a surprisingly good time. online, he's not always as engaging. in pictures, he's not as attractive. but he surprised me by being more engaging and attractive than expected. we talked bout hanging out again. i think it would be nice to have a platonic guy friend who i don't have some complicated dating past with.

****

the alpha boy did his first sweet random thing by buying me a single red rose when we met up for lunch yesterday.

nevermind that he got the idea when he saw his business partner buying a rose for the lunch date he was having with the girl that he's currently interested in. it kinda hit him that "hmm i should do that for my girlfriend too". he admitted that big gestures and all that aren't really like him to do. but he's practiced. i guess some guys have it, and then some guys are just trained.

for now, it all seems okay with me.